Post-Crises Opportunities: A Personal Account of Bereavement and Growth

Abstract

From the moment that they occur crisis events involving personal loss can disrupt people’s lives and irrevocably change how they engage with the world. Living with the crisis of loss in a world that has suddenly become unfamiliar and unpredictable is both existentially and psychologically challenging. In the aftermath of crisis how do survivors go about relearning existence and incorporating the inconceivable into a newly emerging view of the world? In Western society it is quite common for individuals and groups to report that their experiences of powerfully disturbing crisis events have created a set of conditions that forced them to make significant personal changes and resulted in beneficial growth. Thus, in situations perceived of as crises survivors, oscillating between emotional distress and fuller knowledge of reality, might question their core beliefs and goals and establish new ones, whilst simultaneously re-writing and integrating their life narratives in order to maintain psychic and physical balance. This oscillation gently accommodates the pre-crisis elements of survivor’s whole experience and enables the possibility of movement toward continuing future growth and the recognition and use of opportunities. In the last decade or so, mirroring the trend to positively reframe these disrupting states, crisis and bereavement work have become increasingly interested in outcomes that suggest: enhanced psychological well-being and health; personal and spiritual development and increased coping skills; and, improved relationships and enhanced personal resources. This chapter provides an autobiographical account of loss to demonstrate how exposure to crisis can provide opportunities for significant personal transformation. The analysis integrates the conceptual frameworks of Lawrence Calhoun and Richard Tedeschi’s post-traumatic growth model and Stanislav and Christina Grof’s psycho-spiritual, or ‘holotropic’, paradigm, blended with some current ideas about crisis, grief, and bereavement.