Shop Girl: How does one protect their spirit within the confines of consumer capitalism?

Abstract

Work in retail has been described as “emotionally draining work that is undervalued, underpaid and brought up in public discourse very little.” The Shop Girl is the girl behind the counter. The girl “...whose wares shall be always tempting, whose manners shall be always charming, and who shall...stand all the day willing to do the bidding of the hundred-and-one customers which fate may bring her.” I have been the Shop Girl most of my adult life, by now experienced in this “malleable and fluid” identity. “The Shop Girl exists to serve you, she will listen to your needs but when she offers you your prescription, you do not quite trust it is the right one.” I have been well trained in 4 serving the customer, making sure they feel as though they are the only one in the shop. The customer will only ever know me - a limited, truncated, temporary me - within the confines of the shop. The Shop Girl only exists in this space; alive within the opening hours and disappearing after the cash is counted. She is discarded by the customer when they no longer need her. The customer thinks they know the Shop Girl like the Shop Girl knows the customer, but they never will. At some point a line of distinction is drawn between the Shop Girl and who (or what) she protects. Her identity shifts and her performance is dropped as it is no longer needed. This leads to my research question: how does one protect their spirit within the confines of consumer capitalism? I will explore this question through discussing how my performance of the Shop Girl can be protective and how my artistic practice aids this protection too. I begin by discussing the concept of autotheory and its development in feminist writing. I write this essay from the first-person perspective - my perspective. I write about my own experiences working as a Shop Girl and my art practice to create my narrative. Next, I discuss gender as a performance (as outlined in Judith Butler’s essay on t Next, I discuss gender as a performance (as outlined in Judith Butler’s essay on the same topic), how this influences me and my performance as the Shop Girl and in other aspects of my life, and how this performance is protective. I also discuss the apotropaic influences of both the performance of the Shop Girl and of my creative process. I then look at the idea of capitalism as both a mental and a physical constraint, how we as a society are bound to and by capitalism, and how one (I) might find some sense of freedom from it. Throughout the essay I take note from experiences as a worker within a feminine body. I discuss how the idealisations of capitalism force us to work all the time and how these idealisations encourage the idea that there is nothing better than “working” to serve someone before yourself. Finally, I discuss how the carnivalesque aligns with my artmaking process using Mikhail Bakhtin’s ideas to analyse my relationship with the Shop Girl. I also discuss Julia Kristeva’s notion of the abject in relation to myself, the Shop Girl and my art. This leads into my conclusion and a reassessment of my relationship with the Shop Girl